Gospel

As I continue on my journey to find my identity in Christ, I am reading the book A Gospel Primer by Milton Vincent. Today as I was reading there were some sections that hit me hard. In the section entitled Resting in Christ's Righteousness Vincent writes this,

"I never have to do a moment's labor to gain or maintain my justified status before God. Freed from the burden of such a task, I now can put my energies into enjoying God, pursuing holiness, and ministering God's amazing grace to others. The gospel also reminds me that my righteous standing with God always holds firm regardless of my performance, because my standing is based solely on the work of Jesus and not mine. On my worst days of sin and failure, the gospel encourages me with God's unrelenting grace toward me. On my best days of victory and usefulness, the gospel keeps me relating to God solely on the basis of Jesus' righteousness and not mine."

The scripture to support this is as follows:

Romans 4:5 "But people are counted as righteous, not because of their work, but because of their faith in God who forgives sinners."

Romans 5:18-20 "Yes, Adam's one sin brings condemnation for everyone, but Christ's one act of righteousness brings a right relationship with God and new life for everyone. Because one person disobeyed God, many became sinners.But because one other person obeyed God, many will be made righteous. God's law was given so that all people could see how sinful they were. But as people sinned more and more, God's wonderful grace became more abundant."

We all mess up. Just because I have a relationship with God does not mean I will never mess up again. I will. I will give in to temptation and sinful lusts. By His grace alone, I can overcome that sin in my life. However, when I mess up, God still loves me. He forgives me and gives me more grace. My salvation is in Him and does not go anywhere. Therefore my worth does not decrease when I mess up. God still loves me. There is extreme comfort in knowing that truth. That truth should produce an overwhelming love in me for Him.

Vincent also wrote Obedience Borne of Love,

" Therefore, preaching the gospel to myself is a great way to keep God's amazing love before my eyes, so that I might experience its power to produce in me a passionate love for Him in return. Captured by His love in this way, my smitten heart increasingly burns to do His will and feasts itself on doing so."

Some more scripture:

John 15:13 "There is no greater love than to lay down one's life for one's friends."

Psalm 40:8 "I take joy in doing your will, my god, for your instructions are written on my heart."

Matthew 22:37 "Jesus replied, 'You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.'"

A common phrase I use when praying is "May I fall more in love with You today than I did yesterday." I truly want my love for God to grow deeper with every passing day. To fall more intimately in love with Him. For Him to be my everything. My all.

With that, there was one last truth that hit me hard. In the section Perspective in Trials ,Vincent stated:


"For the gospel is the one great permanent circumstance in which I live and move; and every hardship in my life is allowed by God only because it serves His gospel purposes in me. When I view my circumstances in this light, I realize that the gospel is not just one piece of good news that fits into my life somewhere among all the bad. I realize instead that the gospel makes genuinely good news out of every other aspect of my life, including my severest trials. The good news about my trials is that God is forcing them to bow to His gospel purposes and do good unto me by improving my character and making me more conformed to the image of Christ."


Philippians 3:7&8 "I once thought these things were valuable, but now I consider them worthless because of what Christ has done. Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ."

God does everything in our lives for a reason: To draw us closer to Him and for His glory. How I respond to those different things is my choice. What happens later is my choice. I chose to allow God to do whatever He desires in my life so that He may be glorified in and through me and so that I may be drawn closer to Him. I also chose to be open about what God does so that others can be encouraged and draw closer to Him.

God, remind me daily of your gospel and help me to focus on the gospel in everything I do. _lml

Ruth

If you were to ask me my middle name I would smile at you and simply shake my head no. You could guess and ask for hints and I would not help you. If I had told you my middle name in the past and you asked me again because you couldn't remember, I would not tell you again. I partially knew why, but tonight I finally understood completely why I wouldn't share that part of my life with you.

I am named after my grandmother. Now, my grandmother and I did not have a very good relationship. All throughout my childhood she tried to change me. I was the tomboy. She wanted a granddaughter who was ribbon and curls. A girlie girl. I was far from that. As a result I felt as though she resented me. I was one of the only grandchildren named after her, and yet she blocked me from her mind. At Christmas she gave my brothers money, I got a piece of string (I'm not kidding). When I was younger I had a blue mole on my nose. While my cousins were outside playing in the creek, I was sitting in the kitchen w/ egg white from inside the shell on my nose, letting it dry while grandma tried to pull the mole out. I never got a birthday card. As my grandparents were getting older they gathered all the family together to read a living will. I was the only family member not in the will. The only one.

Hurt upon hurt was added through the years. I tried. I tried really hard to be everything she wanted me to be, but it was never enough. When I returned home for her funeral I bawled. I couldn't even remember the last time I had told her I loved her. Truthfully, there was still resentment there. I wanted to tell her I loved her, and I couldn't. I hurt.

Lately I have been dealing with the hurts. Telling God about them and trying to find my confidence in Him and not in what others think of me. Yes, I still long for the approval of those I love, yet truthfully, it doesn't matter. What matters is that I'm living my life for God and that He loves me unconditionally. I am beautiful in His eyes. He made me just the way I am, and therefore I am perfectly and wonderfully made. Psalm 139:13 & 14 says, "You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous-how well I know it!"

I struggle with how others perceive me. As a result, I allow those I love to hurt me. No more. Today I realized the greatest thing I can do is forgive them and respond in love. If I choose to not forgive, I am giving them the power to hurt me. However, if I instantly give the hurt to God, forgive them, and respond in love, I am no longer being hurt. I am loving others in a way that God has told us to love. Unconditionally, just as He loves us. My favorite verse on love has always been 1 Cor. 13:7 "Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance." If I were to love others that way...wow! Imagine how things would change!

Tonight I have forgiven my grandmother. I'm no longer holding on to the hurts. I choose instead to look only at the good memories. Every time I would leave her house, she gave me a flower in a vase. The flower, when turned petals down, looked like a dancer with a beautiful flowing dress. My grandma staid up at night with me when I was suffering from a horrible sunburn and could not sleep. My grandma would brush my hair and tell me it was absolutely beautiful. My grandma didn't laugh at me when I sat on a cactus (don't ask, just remember, tomboy). My grandma would always let me eat a cookie or piece of candy (even if mom and dad said no). My grandma loved me.

My name is Teresa Ruth Appleby. I was named after my grandmother Ruth Appleby who loved God with all her heart and strove to bring others closer to Him in all that she did. I love my grandma.